Are you tired of constant heartbreak? Or hearing your friends say, “You fall in love way too easily”, every time you get dumped? Maybe it’s neither of those things and you’ve simply been finding yourself catching feelings for someone you have no business liking! Regardless, we are here to help!
To avoid felling in love with someone; try to do the following:
Falling in love can be a very tricky business but it should not be confused with a mere crush. A crush normally goes away in the matter of a few weeks and is usually pretty safe and innocent. Love, on the other hand, is a lot riskier and the chances of it going wrong are significantly increased; especially when you know someone isn’t good for you! So, what are you supposed to do?
#1 Recognize the signs immediately
The first step of avoiding falling in love is to recognize your feelings as soon as they start to develop. And no, I’m not talking about after you’ve completely fallen for someone. Let’s roll the wheel back a little shall we?
Learn to recognize some of the first steps of falling in love with someone. They could be very obvious or things you’re doing subconsciously to impress this certain somebody! For starters, ask yourself the following questions.
Have you been spending a lot of time unnecessarily thinking about someone? Do you go out of your way to make sure they notice you daily? If it’s someone at work, have you only been going to the break room when they go? If it’s at school, have you very conveniently been waiting for them by their locker or joining up activities, simply because they are a part of them as well?
#2 Get in the right mindset
Now that you’ve realized that you might be falling for this person, the next step is to accept and remind yourself that falling in love is not an option.
Regardless of how charming this person may seem, if you’re going to do this, you need to start with the right intentions. Recall why falling in love is a bad idea for you and writes down the reasons. This will serve as a reminder every time you want to try something you shouldn’t be doing.
#3 Set your priorities right!
Secondly, you need to get your priorities in order. Ideally, you should start prioritizing yourself if you haven’t been doing so already. Your work, your health, your diet, your friends, etc, it should all come first, and love interests second. Reminding yourself of your priorities will be a great distraction because it’ll shift your focus to things that are important to you.
Once you’ve got your reasons and priorities out on the table, you can start using them as daily affirmations. As silly as it sounds, telling yourself something repeatedly can actually result in you starting to believe in it! So remind yourself of how you’re an independent, successful woman who needs no man until it sticks!
#5 Distancing is key!
Out of sight, out of mind is definitely a concept that applies here! You need to try your best to avoid this person in real life. This can be very hard if you’re in the same friends’ group or work together etc. However, the more distance you put between the two of you, the more likely you are to minimize real-life engagement with them, focus on whether they’re looking at you or not, what they’re doing, etc.
Now when it comes to distance, keeping them away on social media is also encouraged. From blocking them to muting, you need to do everything you can to make sure that you’re not constantly scrolling down their social media to see what they’re up to.
#6 Think of what makes this person unworthy?
Now, stop romanticizing the person and tap into the rational part of your brain to figure out why falling in love with this person is not going to be good for you. One of the easiest ways to do this is to start listing all of their bad qualities and then repeat them to yourself often.
If you’re more aware of their flaws, you’ll likely notice them every time you’re around them, hence successfully, keeping you away!
#7 Distractions, distraction, distractions!
Every time you start to think too much about this person, try and distract yourself. One of the best ways to do this is to shift the focus from them, onto yourself. Have some quality ‘you’ time, get back to a hobby you enjoyed doing, do that spring cleaning that you’ve been putting off and maybe get a regular workout routine started!
Avoid doing things like watching especially cheesy rom coms or listening to love songs because that’ll only enable you. The main purpose of these distractions should be to find happiness in things other than the idea of loving someone, so choose wisely!
#8 Getting your social life back in order!
Nothing can block out the world better than a day out with your girl-friends! Go for lunches, have a sleepover, go shopping, etc. Having a more active social life will take your mind away from thinking about the person you do not want to be thinking about. Plus, the time, attention and love you crave from said person, you’ll be getting from friends instead!
And if not falling with this person is becoming increasingly difficult, the best thing you can do is loop in a friend who will help you stay away from them; someone who’s the opposite of a wingman if you may.
Trying not to fall in love with someone is hard; however, trying to fall out of love with someone can be even harder. So until you’re ready to open yourself up to love again, the best thing you can do is focus on yourself, find happiness in things beyond love, set your priorities straight, and don’t change them for anyone (unless you know in your gut that it’s worth it). Good luck with self- care!
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