You’re having a leisurely coffee at your favorite little café with a close friend on a sunny afternoon, catching up on life and love. And as you both laugh over a shared joke, she leans in her expression a mix of curiosity and slight concern. “Hey,” she starts, hesitating a little, “how can you really tell if a guy is into you for real or if it’s just a fling?”

Of course, you are surprised, but she trusts you anyway, so you want to give her a great answer. I mean, we’ve all been there, wondering if those butterflies are mutual or if we’re reading too much into a simple smile.

The truth is, it’s not always easy to figure out someone else’s feelings, especially when they’re trying to play it cool. But don’t worry, I’ve got some tips that might help. These pointers will help you easily understand if the guy you are seeing or crushing on really likes you or just needs someone to pass the time with.

In this blog post, I will show you different ways to tell if a guy likes you or wants something casual. Are you ready?

8 Ways to Tell if A Guy Likes You or Just Wants a Fling

1. His communication with you will be consistent

So, you know how when someone really cares, they don’t just check in once in a blue moon? That’s exactly what you should look out for. If a guy is genuinely interested, he won’t just text you sporadically or only when it’s convenient for him.

Instead, he’ll make it a point to reach out regularly, whether it’s a good morning message or a check-in after a long day. This consistent communication isn’t just about frequency, either; it’s about quality. If he engages with you, asks about your day and thoughts, and really listens to what you say, it shows a level of care that goes beyond surface-level interest.

2. He will plan quality dates just for you

And speaking of fresh air, let’s talk about the effort he puts into the time you spend together. Does it feel like he’s thrown plans together at the last minute, or does he plan dates that he knows you’ll genuinely enjoy?

If he’s taking the time to organize thoughtful outings or activities that bring a smile to your face, that’s a big green flag. It means that he values the time you spend together enough to make it special. On the flip side, if your meet-ups are mostly last-minute or feel somewhat generic, it might be a sign that he’s not putting much thought into them.

3. He will introduce you to his friends and family

Now, let’s get a bit more into the social side of things. If a guy is serious about you, he’ll want to bring you into his world. That means introducing you to his friends and, when things are getting a bit more serious, his family.

This is his way of showing that you’re important to him and that he’s thinking about a future that includes you. If these introductions haven’t started happening and it feels like he’s keeping you away from his close circles, that might be something to think about. After all, being part of his social life is a step towards being part of his whole life, don’t you think?

4. He will include you in his future plans

Does he talk about things you could do together next summer? Maybe he mentions a concert that’s months away or a vacation idea for next year. When he makes plans that include you, it shows he’s thinking about a path forward with you by his side.

That’s a sign of commitment and a hint that he’s in it for the long haul. If he avoids any mention of the future or keeps plans vague, it might be time to ask where things are heading.

5. He will be very open with you

Moving on to the heart of the matter—how open is he with you? When a guy likes you, he’ll share more than just laughs and plans; he’ll open up about his life, his fears, his dreams, and even his past.

This kind of sharing is a foundation for deep connection. Plus, if he’s equally interested in your life’s details, that’s a solid sign he values you deeply. If conversations tend to stay on the surface, maybe it’s time to go deeper or reconsider the connection.

6. He pays attention to details

Have you ever noticed how he remembers that you hate olives or that story you told him about your childhood? When a guy pays attention to the little things you say and remembers them, it’s not just thoughtful; it’s telling.

It shows that he’s really listening and that he cares about what makes you tick, what makes you laugh, and what makes you, you. These little details make your interactions feel more personal and connected.

7. He will have respect for your boundaries

Let’s talk boundaries. Respecting your personal and emotional boundaries is a cornerstone of any healthy relationship. If he listens when you say ‘no’ or when you express discomfort and adjust his behavior accordingly, it’s a strong indicator of respect and care.

On the other side, if he consistently pushes boundaries or disregards your feelings, it’s a red flag. Remember, respect is non-negotiable.

8. Public vs. private time is important

Lastly, think about where you spend most of your time together. Is he happy to be with you out in the open, perhaps holding your hand at a cafe or joining you at a family BBQ? Or do your encounters tend to be more behind closed doors?

If he enjoys being with you publicly and proudly shows you off, it’s a good sign that he’s serious. However, if you find that you’re mostly meeting up in private, it might be worth discussing his intentions.

8 Ways to Tell if A Guy Likes You or Just Wants a Fling


It is very important to understand where you stand with a guy. It can save you from potential heartache and help you invest your time and emotions wisely. Recognizing the signs we’ve talked about, from how he communicates and plans dates to how he respects your boundaries and includes you in his life, can really clear up a lot of the doubts you might have.

So, take a moment, think about what you’ve observed, and trust your gut. You deserve someone who not only enjoys your company but also respects and values you deeply. Here’s to finding that special someone who shows up for you in all the ways that matter.

Disclosure: This article, other beauty and fashion tips on SheBegan are contributed by experienced fashion professionals, beauty & cosmetics experts. Read our full research and editorial process here. Also, our posts may contain affiliate links, read our full affiliate disclosure

Hi, I'm Lizabeth. I'm a writer. I like to write about stuff relating to love and relationship. I believe love can work for everyone, and if it doesn't work you can always give it another try.

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