A casual relationship can seem like a terrific idea. There are no strings attached, and you would be under no obligation to commit. To maintain an FWB relationship, you must adhere to some rules. A friend asked me during a conversation, “should I keep FWB secret?”.

Yes, you should keep FWB a secret. FWB relationships ought to be casual with no strings attached. There are non-formal relationships and should be treated as such. Publicizing your FWB will only give off the impression of a formal and romantic relationship.

This will complicate the relationship. So, there is no need to make it public. Both you and your FWB partner can agree on who should or shouldn’t know. 

Also, FWB is a convenient relationship. It works for you and your FWB. Not everyone will understand this arrangement, and you might get judged. Being discreet about your FWB will help prolong your FWB relationship. Below are reasons why you should keep your FWB secret.

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11 Reasons You Should Keep FWB a Secret 

Here are some reasons why keeping your FWB a secret is the best decision;

1. To avoid complicating your FWB relationship 

One of the main reasons why you should avoid publicizing your FWB is that it complicates the relationship. Most FWB relationships usually get complicated, even if there are clear boundaries.

If you want to maintain the connection in your FWB relationship, being discreet is a boundary you should not overstep. Telling others about your FWB will give off the impression of a romantic relationship, and your FWB might even have hopes of the relationship transitioning into a formal one. 

2. You don’t have to explain yourself to others 

Keeping your FWB a secret would save you the hassle of explaining yourself to others. When you share sensitive things about your life, such as your FWB relationship, you expose yourself to regularly having to explain your reasons for not wanting a committed relationship. You can avoid this by keeping your FWB relationship private.

3. To respect your partner

Keeping your FWB a secret might be ideal if you are already in a committed relationship or married. Keeping your FWB relationship a secret and away from social media shows that you respect your partner. It also shows that you care about their feelings.

4. To avoid being judged 

 Even though society has become more accepting of FWB relationships, some people are still judgmental. When you are not being discreet about your FWB relationship, you are likely to be judged by others in society.

They might even spread rumors that would end up hurting your loved one. To avoid that, you should consider keeping your FWB a secret.

5. Secret FWB relationships last longer

To maintain and ensure your friends-with-benefits relationship last longer, consider being discreet about it. You and your FWB partner can have a conversation where you would decide who should and shouldn’t know about your FWB arrangement.

By keeping the relationship a secret from certain people, you would not have people trying to convince you why having a casual relationship is wrong.

READ ALSO: How to Turn a One Night Stand Into FWB

6. You protected your FWB relationship from toxicity 

Keeping your friends-with-benefits relationship private protects yourself and your FWB partner from negativity. By sharing your friends-with-benefits relationship with others, you give people the liberty to convey their opinions regarding your arrangement.

People’s opinions regarding your FWB arrangement can be toxic, especially because not everyone understands the idea behind FWB relationships.

Sometimes these negative opinions and the toxic vibes from such judgemental people can negatively affect your friends-with-benefits relationship. By concealing your FWB, you protect your casual relationship. 

7. It’s more fun

Friends-with-benefits relationships are arranged for having fun, intimate encounters. It implies having intense sexual moments with your FWB without any strings attached. Keeping your FWB a secret or being selective about who ought to know will help maintain the arrangement and improve the fun.

When you have a secret friends-with-benefits relationship, you tend to have more fun and will be more focused on satisfying each other under the bedsheets.

8. To end things easily

We all know FWB relationships are bound to end, except if the people involved decide to convert to a romantic relationship. To end your FWB relationship easily, it is best to keep it a secret.

If you portray your FWB relationship as though it was a romantic relationship, chances are your friends and family will get attached to your FWB. This will make ending your FWB relationship difficult because you will have several unsolicited pieces of advice.

9. To maintain your reputation 

Let’s face it, friends with benefits relationships are not exactly accepted in society. So, if you hold a reputable image in your society, workplace, or even your religious bodies, it is best to be discreet about your FWB relationship. Keeping your FWB a secret will help you protect your reputation and prevent the spreading of rumors

10. If your FWB is not comfortable 

 If your friends-with-benefits partner is not comfortable with publicizing the arrangement and has specifically asked you to be discreet. Then it is best to respect that and keep your FWB confidential. This will show your FWB partner that you respect their decision and would Increase the trust between you both. 

11.  If you can’t withstand criticism

Friends-with-benefits relationships usually receive criticism or judgments from people. Several people disapprove of such relationships and would always acknowledge their opinions about it. If you can’t handle criticism or judgmental comments, you should keep your FWB a secret. 

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How to Keep Your FWB a Secret

Keeping your FWB a secret is essential if you want to maintain the arrangement and avoid being judged by others. Here is how to keep FWB a secret; 

1. Figure out the perfect meeting place 

To keep your FWB a secret, it is pivotal that you decide on the ideal meeting place. You would not want a situation where someone is likely to walk in or see you together and suspect something is going on between you. Choose a meeting place that allows you and your FWB to have fun without any interruptions. 

2. Do not engage with each other on social media platforms 

Engaging with each other and sharing pictures together on social media platforms will likely start rumors. Your friends and family would come on you with numerous questions seeing you relating or engaging with an unrecognized person. 

3. Avoid hanging out in crowds

Avoid hanging out in crowds together if you want to keep your FWB relationship a secret. By hanging out together in public, you run the risk of being spotted by others. This might raise suspicion that you both are in an FWB relationship, especially because you haven’t introduced your FWB. 

ALSO READ: Is It Normal For FWB To Get Jealous?

Who Should Know About Your FWB Relationship? 

The people who ought to know about your friends-with-benefits relationship depend on your agreement with your friends-with-benefits partner. There is a need to define clearly who should know and shouldn’t know about your arrangement. 

Meanwhile, It is not advisable to publicize your FWB relationship. However, you can tell a few confidential people you trust if you must. These can be your family, friends, spouse, etc. FWB relationships can be healthy and more fun when there are fewer people aware of the arrangement. You should only disclose your FWB when it is necessary and only to people you trust. 


Most friends-with-benefits relationships are maintained when there are no third-parties meddling in the affairs of the arrangements. So, if you have also been asking yourself, should I keep my FWB relationship a secret? Yes, you should. Being discreet about your FWB is healthy, as you can see from the above prudent reasons.

Disclosure: This article, other beauty and fashion tips on SheBegan are contributed by experienced fashion professionals, beauty & cosmetics experts. Read our full research and editorial process here. Also, our posts may contain affiliate links, read our full affiliate disclosure

Hi, I'm Lizabeth. I'm a writer. I like to write about stuff relating to love and relationship. I believe love can work for everyone, and if it doesn't work you can always give it another try.

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