It’s a common question on dating sites: “What are you looking for?” And that’s not surprising. People want to know their potential matches before they meet them in person.

It could save you from wasting time with someone who doesn’t match what you’re looking for, but it also helps them figure out if they’re interested in meeting you.

Here’s how to answer what you are looking for on a dating site.

Several Ways to Answer What You Are Looking For on Dating Site

You don’t want to be too specific, but you do want to be thoughtful. Be honest about what you’re looking for in a partner and clarify that you’re not expecting perfection.

For example: “I’m looking for someone confident, open-minded, and kind.” If you have any preferences or requirements (e.g., “must love hiking.”), include those as well. But don’t put anyone down by saying they aren’t what you’re looking for

You can answer with the following response when you are asked what you are looking for on a dating site: 

  1. You are a gregarious, outgoing, and closely knit community of friends or family around you. That doesn’t mean “No introverts,” just that I want someone who draws people to him and welcomes them in.”
  2. “This IS a personal matter: Step aside, married men. I’m sure you have a fascinating and intricate narrative to tell. Tell me when you’re not sharing a bed or a bank account with another person. Furthermore, I am completely disinterested in any “polyamory” arrangement.”
  3. You’re enthusiastic about something. There is a topic that you are passionate about, to the point that your friends have to interrupt you and say, “OK, enough about that.”

ALSO READ: Can I Subscribe To Dating Sites With Google Gift Cards?

What Is the Dating App Site Meant For

You can use it to meet someone new, or if you’re in a relationship, to find new friends. If you’re single and looking for love, matchmakers can help us find matches that are right for us. They have a better understanding of what we’re looking for than we might have ourselves – though some people prefer to do their searching.

Dating sites give people who may not otherwise have the opportunity (or time) to meet others outside of work or social events another avenue through which they can connect with others.

If it’s important to you that your partner share similar interests as yours, then finding out early on whether they share those same passions will save both of you time later. Because when things aren’t working out as well as expected due solely to differences in opinion over simple yet very important matters such as this one.

How To Tell Someone On A Dating Site You Want Something Serious

1. Tell them about your relationship goals

This is a great way to start any conversation on a dating app, especially if you’ve been talking for a while and are ready to get serious with someone. The best way to do this is by simply asking the other person what their relationship goals are so that everyone is on the same page from the beginning.

This can be followed up by telling them about your relationship goals and ensuring that they match up nicely with theirs so that both parties are happy with what’s being offered.

2. If you want a serious relationship, don’t hide it

Be clear about what you want. It’s okay to say that you are looking for a serious relationship, even if that means a long-term commitment (or marriage). You can also say this in the context of being open to the possibility of having children. If one or both of those things are important to you, don’t hide it.

You may think, “I don’t want anybody else knowing my business like that. I am afraid they will judge me.” First, everyone has their version of “serious relationship/long-term commitment/marital status/having children” in their mind; there is no universal definition for any of these terms. Don’t worry about other people’s definitions; just set your boundaries and stick with them.

Most importantly, remember that relationships take time and effort on both sides before they become successful ones, and making sure the other person knows where you stand from day one will save tons more work down the line when things get hard or confusing.

3. Make it straightforward on your profile

Being clear and specific is essential regarding what you are looking for on a dating site. You don’t have to write an essay. Just make sure your profile gives a clear idea of your preferences. It’s also important that you be honest about yourself and what you want in a partner. Suppose you’re looking for a serious relationship but never mention it on your profile or in messages. 

Also, consider how your photos might affect someone else’s perception of how much fun and adventure they can expect with their match. For example: Is there any chance that anyone other than some friends would get excited by seeing pictures of yourself surrounded by dogs? Or eating at the local dive bar? Or hiking through the woods? If so, maybe leave those photos off until after the first date. 

4. Profile pitfalls to avoid

The following are a few common profile pitfalls to avoid:

  • Don’t be too longwinded. We all have a lot of things we want to say, but you should make sure every piece of information in your profile is relevant and well-written. If there’s a great story that won’t fit in the allotted space, consider adding it as an “About Me” section on your page or as an additional paragraph within one of the main sections (e.g., “My Story”).
  • Don’t be too vague. Give some thought to how much information about yourself you want to share with others; don’t risk coming across as boring or insecure by just listing off facts without context or explanation. Think about what experiences have shaped who you are today, what values are important to you now, etc., and include those details in your profile so readers can better understand why they should get excited about meeting up with someone like YOU.
  • Avoid being too specific (or not at all). It’s better if everyone gets their fair shot at making connections here. Therefore avoid putting anything down that might prevent someone from reading through other profiles before theirs (like mentioning which gender/orientation/relationship status/etc., unless applicable). This could narrow down their options unnecessarily when trying different combinations until something works out well for both parties involved later on down the line.

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How to Write a Dating Profile On Dating Sites

1. Have a good username

People tend to remember a username that relates to the person’s interests. A good example of this would be “chef_of_the_month,” if you are someone who loves cooking and happens to be single at the time. Another is “seahawkshavenice,” as it’s not just memorable (a Seahawks fan) but also unique and conveys a sense of humor. Some examples of bad usernames:

  • “hot mama” – It’s offensive since it implies that all single moms are hot, which they’re not. And why would you want someone who finds your children attractive?
  • “coolguy15” – Not memorable or unique, either. Plus, it says nothing about what makes you cool; maybe if your username was something like “GQ723” instead?
  • Anything longer than 20 characters – This makes it difficult for other people on the site to read your username when they see it in their search results list. They might have difficulty getting an accurate mental picture of who you are based on how long your username is (or isn’t).

2. Have a great catchy dating site headline

There are many things to talk about when looking for a partner. You can be picky about looks and personality, but your dating site headline should always include something that clarifies what you’re looking for. That way, potential matches will know if they want to reach out or not.

  • What kind of partner do you want? Do they have to be older, Taller, Shorter? Do they have any hobbies that make them unique? Use examples from past relationships to show how vital these qualities are to you.
  • Make it clear what you aren’t looking for: It’s also important not to ignore the negative things that might draw someone away from being a good match either. For example, if religion plays an important role in your life and theirs doesn’t align with yours, then this could be a deal breaker (and vice versa).

3. Make sure that you are not selling yourself short in your headline

Remember, online dating is a business. You are a product, and you need to sell yourself. Don’t be afraid to tell people what you are looking for, and don’t be scared to say what you aren’t looking for. If someone is not your type, then tell them so they can move on with their life and find someone who fits their preferences.

Don’t be afraid, to be honest about the things that you have going for yourself, such as how long it has been since your last relationship or marriage and other facts about your life, such as where you work or live (small town vs big city)

4. Get help from friends

To get help from your friends, you should ask them for feedback on your profile. You’ll want to ask friends for their honest opinion of what they see and if it’s something that needs some improvement or tweaking.

You will also want to ask these people for feedback on what is going into your profile before posting it so that when it does go live, there aren’t any errors or typos in the text. This can be embarrassing on several levels, so make sure everything is perfect before putting it up online.

5. It’s not a biography, be precise

Don’t write a biography. Don’t write a book about yourself, your life, your experiences or what you are looking for in another person. It’s not a biography, it’s not the story of your entire life, and it’s not an interview for the local newspaper where you will be asked to explain every last detail of who you are and what makes you tick. 

It is also not a book report from a school where every little thing about yourself needs to be explained in detail to prove that there is more than meets the eye when it comes to ‘me.’

ALSO READ: Dating Apps: How to Use Them and Managing Your Expectations


It can be a little intimidating if you consider an answer to the question “What are you looking for?” on a dating site. But remember that nobody expects you to have a perfect answer to this question. It doesn’t matter if it’s your first time or you’ve been through hundreds of dates. All that matters is that you’re honest and genuine when answering these questions; nobody wants to fight with someone over how they feel.

You may find it difficult to answer what you are looking for on a dating site. The easiest way to answer this question is by considering the type of person you’d like to date and then listing those traits. Here’s an example:

“I’m looking for someone who’s into fitness, has a sense of humor, likes traveling, and loves music.” This can be easily turned into an answer such as “I’m looking for someone who loves to travel, workout, and have fun,” which is much more concise but still gives off the same vibe as your original answer.

Disclaimer: This article, other beauty and fashion tips on SheBegan are contributed by experienced fashion professionals, beauty & cosmetics experts. Read our full research and editorial process here. Also, our posts may contain affiliate links, read our full affiliate disclosure

Hi, I'm Lizabeth. I'm a writer. I like to write about stuff relating to love and relationship. I believe love can work for everyone, and if it doesn't work you can always give it another try.

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