Are you in a romantic entanglement with a man who is married? It can be difficult to set your feelings and emotions aside and walk away from a married man, especially if you truly love him.
Detaching yourself from an affair with someone else’s husband is the right thing to do. This is because being with a married man can be painful, destructive, and torturing your emotions.
However, even though it hurts to walk away from him, it would be worth the pain. As a dating coach, my client who has an affair with a married man recently asked me, “How to walk away from a married man “ Well, let’s find out.
Steps To Walk Away From A Married Man
1. Be honest to yourself
It’s time to talk some sense to yourself. Yes, you love him, and he makes you happy, but it is time to face reality. He is married to someone else, and even though he might have promised to leave his wife, you are only hurting yourself by being with him.
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Sure, you might be a victim, and you had no idea he is a married man, or you were in it for the fun, and you never thought you will fall in love with him.
But, emotions aside, it’s time to use your head and ask yourself, “is it right to date a married man?” You must acknowledge and accept that you are wrong and plan to end the affair.
So, snap out of the fantasy that you will ever end up together, be realistic, and understand that you are just the other woman. There is no future dating a married man, so you need to walk away.
2. Think about the cons of dating a married man
If you are still wondering if you should walk away, you should probably consider the inconveniences of dating a married man. There are several disadvantages of dating a married man, below are some;
You’ll always feel guilty and ashamed to introduce him to your family or friends. You get judgemental stares from people, and thus you’ll have to hide the relationship from the public.
Furthermore, when dating a married man, the relationship has no future. You will never have kids or even get married. The man will never be committed to the relationship, and you may miss out on meeting the right man.
There are so many cons associated with being with a married man. The list is endless. I advise that to get a paper, consider all the disadvantages of dating a married man and write them down. Read it constantly so it sinks in, and make that decision to walk away from him.
3. Get ready for the conversation
On the flip side, while you see everything wrong in dating him (a married man ), he sees nothing wrong with the relationship. He assumes you are happy and comfortable with the hidden relationship. Most times, he might not even be expecting that you’ll walk away if you haven’t shown any signs that you want to end the relationship.
So, you need to prepare for the conversation you’d have with him. This is because he will likely try to convince you to stay. Before having the conversation, think about what and how you will say it. Also, when and where will you break up with him? You can also seek the help of your best friend when preparing for the conversation.
Meanwhile, you should also be firm and stand your ground because he’ll try to convince you to stay by giving you reasons that the relationship is okay and worth continuing. You need to stand your ground, break up with him, and walk away without second thoughts.
4. Cut off all communications with him
After walking away from him, I think it’s best you cut off all contact with him. I mean that there should be no messages, calls, texts, emails, voicemails, and everything that would keep the both of you in touch. For instance, I think you should search for a new job if you have the same workplace.
He will try to win you back. Keeping in contact with him will only give you second thoughts, and you might even go back to him because you might still be in love with him.
Also, for your sanity, it is best if you don’t agree to be friends. You should focus on your life and move on because that wouldn’t be possible if you’re still in touch.
Meanwhile, if your thoughts constantly wander off to him and you can’t ignore him, you should remind yourself why you split in the first place. You ended off because he isn’t yours. He is married and has a family. You should also strive to have your own family and not be someone’s mistress.
Don’t allow him to get back into your life, focus on yourself, and make yourself happy. Remember, you deserve better than being someone’s second choice.
5. Expect that it would be painful
Breakups are painful, especially if you loved your partner, the fact that he is a married man doesn’t make the pain any less. So, don’t be hard on yourself. It allows your heart to heal from the pain. Yes, you are allowed to cry, but focus on getting better after that.
Since he is a married man, breaking up might be the best thing to do, but that doesn’t mean you are not hurt, especially if you hope for a future with him. Don’t torture yourself with regrets for getting involved with a married man. It has already happened, and all you need do is move on.
Meanwhile, don’t try to force anything. Pain heals gradually and at in own pace. The pain will ease in time, and hopefully, you will be ready to move on with a new partner.
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Advantages Of Walking Away From A Married Man
Walking away from a married man gives you an immense amount of peace. Your conscience will be clear, and you’d have the opportunity to meet new people. Here are some of the advantages of walking away from a married man.
1. You regain your mental and physical health
Dating a married man can affect your physical and mental health. You will be drained and exhausted from all the secrecy and emotional traumas. Ending the relationship with a married man would help you focus on regaining your mental and physical health.
2. You bond with your family and friends
Dating a married man is an unhealthy relationship that can make you disconnect from your loved ones. Ending your relationship with the married man would allow you to bond with your family and friends.
3. You no longer have to hide your relationship from the public
When dating a married man, you’ll have to be secretive about the person You love constantly. People wouldn’t have to judge you for going out with someone’s husband. You’ll even be happier.
4. You have the opportunity to meet the right man
When dating someone, especially a married man, you would not have the opportunity to meet the right single man. So, walking away from the affair makes you available to mingle with the right man.
5. You can get a committed man
Dating a married man means you are the second option. He wouldn’t be committed to the relationship because he is already committed to someone else. So, if you walk away from a married man, you are available to meet a single guy that will commit to the relationship.
Disadvantages Of Dating A Married Man
Dating a married man has several disadvantages. Here are some;
1. A married man won’t be fully committed to your relationship
A major downside of dating a married man is that he wouldn’t be fully committed to you. Yes, he might care for you and also probably provide for you, but that doesn’t change the fact he is someone else’s husband.
He is already committed to his wife (for better or worse) and even kids as a married man. You’ll always be the second fiddle. Dating a married man comes with several traumas, one of them is not having a committed man.
2. The relationship is not healthy
A relationship with someone else’s husband can never be a healthy relationship. For a relationship to be healthy, it should have respect, trust, loyalty, compromise, and even a clear communication path.
An affair with a married man is bound to lack these traits. Meanwhile, an unhealthy relationship is only going to make you unhappy.
3. There is no future for the relationship
Having a relationship with a married man has no future, yes, you both might be in love, but the relationship wouldn’t last. This is because he has a family, and as long as he is married to someone else, you will always be a second choice.
I mean that a relationship with a married man has no path. It would end one day, leaving you with emotional traumas, which you can prevent by walking away.
4. Your relationship would lack trust
There will be mistrust in a relationship with a married man. This is because you will have thoughts that he will betray you. For instance, “if he can betray his wife and cheat on her, what happens when he meets another attractive lady”?
Dating a married man doesn’t give you insurance that he will be loyal, he can always date another person.
5. There won’t be respect in the relationship
A relationship with a married man is one without any iota of respect. Respect for each other in a relationship connotes understanding and considering each other’s wishes, feelings, and opinions.
The man wouldn’t respect your feelings and sometimes even your opinions. He would not always be there for you, which can be painful.
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6. You are just second fiddle
Another con of dating a married man is that you’re a second choice, and he always has an option to go back to his wife. He will only be around you when he needs something from you.
Meanwhile, no matter how solid and lovely your relationship with a married man is, acknowledge that he has a wife to return to daily. You might even be some sort of fun to him.
7. You would be the only one trying to retain the relationship
When having an affair with a married man, you’ll always be the one doing your best to make the relationship work while your lover doesn’t even care. For example, you are always available when he needs you, while he can only spare a few minutes because he needs to attend to family issues.
Also, even when he wants to spend time with you, it always has to be secretly for a few hours. I mean that spending time with him will always depend on his availability.
8. You can’t reach out to him whenever you want
When having an affair with a married man, you would be limited on how and when you can communicate with him. For instance, sometimes you’d feel like talking to him but can’t because he may be with his wife.
This means that you will always have to be cautious about whether or not you should call your partner. This can be frustrating, especially if you have something important to tell him.
9. Your relationship would be a secret
If you are dating a married man, you can’t freely express your love for him in public. You would always be afraid that someone would see you both together. This is a huge downside to dating a married man.
Relationships are meant to be enjoyed. You shouldn’t have to be worried about being with the one you love or even terrified that someone might see you. This is why you should never date a married man.
10. He may never be yours entirely
There is no guarantee that he will leave his wife and family to be with you. Also, he may never marry you. However, when he marries you, he might also cheat on you.
So, when dating a married you will always doubt him, his words, and even the relationship you both share.
Conclusion
Due to unforeseen reasons, you may decide to have a relationship with a married man. This can be unhealthy and might even affect your mental health. Meanwhile, it can be difficult to figure out “How to walk away from a married man “this article is meant to help you end your affair.
